The logistical nightmare that is commercial downhill skiing
"I'll go for the massage instead"
Since this is supposed to be a health and wellness blog, let’s start with the positive aspects to skiing. If you’re looking to lose weight on your body (and wallet), skiing might be for you. A day of skiing must burn a bazillion calories. The beer and pasta won’t help, but lugging your gear across the parking lot, up the stairs, wrestling the kids in their gear, ski down the hill most of the day, alternate between cold, which burns more calories, and sweating, all at 8-10,000ft, lug all that gear at the end of the day, all in your new concrete boots? It’s exhausting. And talk about quads burning. Nothing matches a leg workout quite like skiing. They are rubber at the end of the day.
I learned to ski in New England at the age of 10. Mostly for social reasons, my friends were doing it, and it was easier through the school program. The learning curve involved a lot of misery. Freezing rain, cheap equipment, being dragged up hill by the rope tow. Eventually I learned through attrition.
Is skiing good for your mental health? Good as a “break?” I’ll let you be the judge. Let’s start your ski trip…
You got off work at 3pm Friday, and the spouse packed the SUV and kids’ stuff (which started earlier in the week). You have a 3-4 hour drive to the resort, and need to find the Air BnB in the dark. You’re exhausted and exhilarated to start the vacation. You probably sleep pretty well from that exhaustion.
You wake up at 7ish, because there’s a lot of shit to get done. You and the kids need to get dressed in all the layers. You either brought breakfast, or you need to go out to eat. Coffee line at Starbucks? That’s your first line of the day.
The next line is at the rental shop. There might be a line forming. Not usually a lot of kid whining yet, because they’re pretty excited. Everyone needs to be “fitted.” Let’s say that place is amazing. 20 minutes tops.
Next you secure gear to racks, and drive up the mountain. I’ll be gracious, let’s say another 20 minutes. Unload in parking lot, and start carrying gear to base area. Next line is for tickets, although technology has started to help with this. Maybe you have a QR code. Lessons? Another line, but probably worth it. Lockers to put home gear in?
I was stupid enough to go skiing Christmas Eve morning once. Every single kid was on school break, and the families all had vacation time. I was standing in the locker room (insanity) and there was this kid who just kept plunking quarters, one after another into this locker. Kerplunk, kerplunk…Except this locker had no key. It was being used. After a minute ( I would have said something had I noticed), the angry dad comes over, and screams “Are you kidding me?!?!? Pay attention!” That was a premonition of their skiing day, and mine.
Next lines are for the ski lifts. Still everyone is excited, so doing good. I won’t bore you with the rest, although that is the START of your skiing day. The end in reverse order, 6 hours later, and get dinner for the family. Likely line at the restaurant. Kids still in a good mood? No, that’s a negative.
Oh , and there is this culture where some people like to get drunk or high while skiing. That doesn’t always help.
I tried getting my kids to ski when they were young, and I think they stood in too many lines, and are now not interested. Part of me wants to go on skiing vacations as a family, and part of me does not. Money is a big part of that equation. Some ski areas are now charging $100-225 per day, for one person.
I said “commercial downhill” in the title, because there is cross country, and hiking skiing. I have done some of that, and it is extremely un-stressful.
So should you learn to ski? That’s a hard question to answer. The last three years have taught how short life is. If you’re determined, I have some advice.
Be near enough to a ski area. Buy the season pass. Buy fitted boots, but used skis. Get lessons. Learn to ski 2-4 hours/day, several days per week, vs the sadistic 8 hours/day, once every month. Most ski injuries happen at the end of the day, due to exhaustion. We pay so much for one ski day, we feel like we have to get it all in, every penny worth. Are there any other sports you do for 8 hours/day? Most of us do not.
Should you go skiing?
My wife answered the subtitle.